A Cup of Tea, a Cookie, and Yu
by ArcaneWeapon
Summary: -One Shot- What do Yu Yevon and Jecht do in their spare time when they aren't ravaging Spira?


A Cup of Tea, a Cookie, and Yu

**A FFX Fan Fiction by: ArcaneWeapon**

**This is my 3rd fic from The Pairing Game with Jecht and Yu Yevon as the pairing this time. This should be funny and I hope you enjoy it. There is no yaoi so turn around if that's what you were looking for. Thanks to Angel Taisha for helping me come up with the name! Disclaimer: I don't own any of the chars in this fic except Osiris, he's my muse.**

It was a beautiful and sunny day inside Sin. Yu Yevon was strolling through the garden admiring the beautiful red roses and wondering where his only real companion was. When he had first met Jecht the man had hated him, but as time passed and they got to know each other they became good friends. The sun glistened off Yu Yevon's silver hair and made his purple eyes glow as he neared the small house at the end of the pebble walkway. He climbed the steps and gently knocked on the door before announcing himself.

"Good morning Jecht!" Yu Yevon called out. "It's almost time for lunch and you still haven't come out to see how beautiful it is today. I've never seen our artificial sun glow so brilliantly. I hope your head isn't hurting you too much," he taunted.

"Stop pounding on that door! My head hurts enough already without you trying to break it down!" a deep voice growled back in anger.

"Now, now, Jecht, remember your manners and be polite. I did warn you not to eat that beer store," Yu Yevon replied in a singsong voice.

_**Flashback**_

The people of Kilika were all standing outside their homes, looking up into the sky, eyes filled with terror, confusion, and hatred. Sin, the slayer of all, the destroyer of lives, was flying in a figure eight. The village had just begun reconstruction and now it seemed like Sin was back to destroy it again.

"Mommy, why is Sin acting funny like Daddy sometimes does after coming home from work?" a little boy asked his mother while lightly tugging on her dress.

"Go back inside Osiris, it's not safe out here. Sin might just be taunting us before he attacks," the mother said as she gently pushed her son towards the opening of their house, never taking her eyes off the beast above.

To everyone's surprise Sin didn't attack. Instead the huge flying whale starting drifting north, doing back flips occasionally. Everywhere Sin flew people screamed in fear before wondering what was going on. Sin never showed itself without attacking, yet now it seemed like Sin was just taking a pleasure cruise and exploring Spira. The joy ride ended, however, when Sin narrowly avoided crashing straight into Mt. Gagazet and plunged into the ocean.

_**End Flashback**_

"You never told me that the alcohol would affect me! I didn't think a huge flying whale could get drunk!" Jecht shouted back.

"Oh stop being such a crybaby Jecht. All that happened was that people realized Sin could get drunk and that he wouldn't kill people when he was intoxicated. There are plans to build large storehouses of alcohol near every town in an attempt to persuade Sin to attack them instead," Yu Yevon replied with laughter in his voice. "All we've lost is our reputation for being a merciless slaughterer, nothing really important."

The door exploded outward as Yu Yevon stopped talking and he barely had time to dodge as a brown haired, well muscled, tattoo covered man came barreling out of his room. Jecht grabbed Yu Yevon by his neck and lifted him off the ground with one hand before slamming him into the wall.

"Never call me a crybaby again! Do you understand me!" he thundered, his eyes lighting up with rage.

Yu Yevon's body glowed with a blue light and Jecht was thrown back ten feet to crash into the rail of the balcony before flipping over it and landing on his back in the dirt.

"Very well, I won't call you a crybaby and you won't lay hands on me, sounds like a deal. We should head over to the greenhouse and have a cup of tea to calm us down," Yu Yevon said as the glow faded and he floated over to help Jecht to his feet.

The two men started walking along the pathway, discussing how well the flowers were growing before they reached the greenhouse. An ornate fountain depicting Seymour stood next to the greenhouse, water shooting out its mouth up into the air. When they entered the greenhouse, the scent of the various orchids that were planted there immediately permeated their noses. They came to a table in the center of the room where a pot of tea, two cups, and a stack of cookies awaited them. They each took a seat and Yu Yevon began pouring the tea for both of them.

"Yu you little devil, can I call you Yu?" Jecht asked as he tasted the tea and recoiled from its bitterness. "It's so much easier to say, and to be honest it sounds a lot better."

Yu Yevon handed Jecht the sugar bowl before responding, "As long as I can call you Jech then you can call me Yu."

"Jech? That's just cutting off the 't'!" Jecht exclaimed as he stirred the sugar into his tea.

"Ah, but it's shorter isn't it?" Yu Yevon replied raising an eyebrow before grabbing a cookie.

"I suppose it is at that," Jecht chuckled. He had a deep, throaty, genuine laugh that Yu sometimes wished he had. "Well why did you want to talk to me so badly? It's not as if we don't have much time together."

"We need to talk about your son, you know he means to kill us," Yu Yevon said gravely.

"Meh, there's no way that little crybaby will manage to kill us. I just brought him here hoping that he might grow up but I doubt he will," Jecht said dejectedly.

Yu Yevon coughed into his hand and quietly muttered "hypocrite" before rolling his eyes.

"What was that?" Jecht shouted, half standing up as he reached for his sword.

"What?" Yu Yevon asked in fake confusion, "I was just choking on a cookie crumb that lodged in my throat."

Jecht looked at Yu Yevon suspiciously before sitting back down and resuming the conversation. "Anyways, he would have to get through me to hurt you if he did make it here," Jecht boasted.

"That's comforting," Yu Yevon said idly as he stood up and started examining the orchids, making sure there were no aphids that could potentially kill the flowers.

"If you're so worried about this summoner then why don't we just go kill her now and end this? I mean if a summoner's purpose is to destroy Sin and bring the Calm why doesn't Sin just go kill them first? We even had this new one, Tuna or something, on a boat and we didn't harm her! Instead her guardians gave us a nice fin massage and then you ordered me to ignore them and destroy Kilika instead! Sometimes you confuse me to no end Yu."

"Stop referring to yourself in the third person," Yu Yevon muttered, "Anyways we don't kill every summoner because it's their job to bring false hope to Spira. Who cares if I'm gone for two years? I always come back. Anyways, it gives me time to meet my new set of armor and befriend it."

There was a long period of silence as Jecht thought about what Yu Yevon had told him before he stood up and started helping him take care of the orchids.

Jecht shattered the silence like an egg falling from the roof of a ten-story building when he spoke up, "We're going to have to get rid of the garden and the greenhouse Yu… No one will be afraid of us if they fight us in the middle of a rose patch. I suppose they might die from laughter though…"

"I know Jech, I know…" Yu Yevon said quietly as he smiled slightly, "I've had to do it before and I can do it again. It's just another reason why those two years are nice."

"I know!" Jecht exclaimed cheerfully trying to break the somber mood, "Lets go watch a Blitz game! We might even be able to see my son playing!"

"Jech… I don't think the rest of the crowd would be too thrilled if Sin tried to enter a Blitz stadium…" Yu Yevon replied.

"Fine then!" Jecht shouted, not giving up, "lets go play Screamers! We each have one hour to see who can make more people scream when they see us! I'll go first then you can have control!"

At the bottom of the ocean the huge whale began moving upward, headed in the direction of Bevelle, its mouth curved as if it were smiling.

**Authors Note: I hope you enjoyed the story, please respond and tell me if you did. Thanks to Anrixan for helping me come up with a general idea for this fic, Tagg and Angel Taisha for refreshing my memory while I was writing it, and of course to The RyRy for giving me the pairing in the first place!**


End file.
